LarkNews.com is Christian satire at its best. Here’s an excerpt from Denominations reach non-compete agreement:
ATLANTA — Hoping to reverse on-going membership losses, several denominations have entered into a non-compete agreement that carves up certain U.S. cities into exclusive evangelism areas.
“We all need breathing room to build our congregations back up,” says a Southern Baptist Convention representative who was at the negotiations. “Instead of competing head to head now we can plow our own fields.”
The controversial agreement, which has received little publicity, establishes boundaries for proselytizing, direct-mailing, church planting and small group formation in the cities of Atlanta and St. Louis, which are being used as test cases. The Assemblies of God was granted the southwest side of Atlanta while the Southern Baptists took most of the eastern part. St. Louis was divided evenly, east and west.
“This takes the muddle out of evangelism efforts and makes it clear who should work where,” says one pastor. “I think it’s a great idea.”
Read more over at Larknews.com.
As a sort of segue back into reality: what would a city look like if churches were this strategic in their ministries?
