There’s a challenging article by Susan Windley-Daoust over at Godspy looking back at last year’s Amish school shooting. If you recall, in the immediate aftermath of the shooting there was a great deal of discussion about the fact that the families of the victims so openly forgave the killer, with no sign of animosity. Windley-Daoust writes:
I remember last October’s fascination with forgiveness like this: millions of people sitting around, staring at the television, mumbling “that’s incredible…” and shaking their heads. Translation: that’s admirable, but I have no idea how they do that, and I know I couldn’t. Indeed, given how reporters reacted to the Amish lack of anger and their practice of forgiveness, I suspect they felt the same way.
She goes on to ask some tough questions: is forgiveness always the proper Christian response to sin? If so, why did the Amish community’s forgiving response strike so many people as strange or even inappropriate? Can Christians get angry about sin, and if so, how does that fit into the question of forgiveness?
I’m curious what you guys think about this. Let me toss a few more specific questions out there for you to think about:
- What was your reaction last year to the Amish community’s open forgiveness?
- Is anger an appropriate or noble Christian response to something like this? Is anger a failure to respond in a Christian manner?
- Is it really possible (in practice, not just in theory) both to be seriously angry at someone, and to genuinely forgive them? How have you dealt with this in your own life?
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October 24, 2007 at 11:28
I think there is room for Christian anger when evil is ongoing and needs to be faced. But once the evil has passed, continuing anger only hurts the one who is angry. Only forgiveness can allow you to move on. That said, to forgive is not to ignore evil but to call it what it is, to name it but refuse to let it control you. You don’t forgive someone for being good, only for being evil, so the very act of forgiving means insisting that you have been wronged, even while you refuse to perpetuate that wrong.
That this is true can be seen from the opposite side as well. Think about what it is like to be forgiven; unless you recognize that you have actually done wrong, forgiveness feels insulting, not loving.
Not that it’s an easy thing to do. I’m as impressed as anyone that the Amish were able to do it so publicly.
October 24, 2007 at 12:35
Anger most certainly has a place in response to sin. In the Gospels we see our Lord getting angry at the Pharisees and at the merchants in the temple. The trick is not to stay in that anger, but to move into forgiveness. While anger may be permitted, forgiveness is commanded in the Scriptures. It may be a long healing process, but we must eventually and repeatedly forgive.
The opposite extreme to unforgiveness is also a problem to be avoided. When unconditional forgiveness allows a sin to continue unchecked, that is not right either. Scripture also commands us to correct our neighbors when they are sinning and to protect the vulnerable. Forgiveness cannot include permitting a sin to happen again without taking any action whatsoever to stop it, particularly if the sin involved harming others.
October 24, 2007 at 13:28
I would say that you never really know until it happens to you. From the outside of the situation, you can say, “you have to forgive”, but when it is your child that was murdered, then it’s an extremely tough situation. Anger in itself is not wrong. The Bible says that “in your anger, do not sin”. Meaning that there’s room for anger, but don’t let that anger manifest into vengeance or sin.
October 24, 2007 at 13:35
“In your anger, do not sin.” (Ephesians 4:26, NIV)
I reacted to the Amish attitude toward the shooting with a similar degree of amazement, then a bit of shame.
On the other hand, the Bible does mention anger in a constructive light. I’m not saying I know where the balance is always, but we are to “speak the truth in love” (Ephesians 4:15).
Perhaps if more people witnessed this kind of behavior, we would have more opportunities to share how it is possible.
October 24, 2007 at 16:09
“Sometimes, faith helps ordinary men and women do the humanly impossible: to forgive, to love, to heal and to redeem. It makes no sense. It is the most sensible thing in the world. The Amish have turned this occasion of spectacular evil into a bright witness to hope.” – Rod Dreher (“Amish Faith Shines, Even in Tragic Darkness”)- Dallas Morning News
I couldn’t agree with his statement more. The condition of humanity expects anger, and thus thirsts for forgiveness. Forgiveness is what the world needs to see.
That’s NOT saying that if the world and humanity were in a different way expecting forgiveness that it wouldn’t need to see anger to shake up it’s apathy.
The world sees anger everyday, the action that would bring the most hope into today’s world would be a pure act of unadulterated forgiveness.
October 24, 2007 at 17:30
The Amish in this instance just showed the Christian world what is the divine response to a crisis such as this. As a Christian, you really have to take a look at yourself and then pray to Jesus to have this kind of response.
Only Jesus can you such renewing of the mind.
October 25, 2007 at 10:31
I think sometimes anger seems powerful while grief seems weak. Then anger becomes a pride and control mechanism rather than an honest reaction to an event. When people are overcome by evil and their actions hurt others there is room for grief for everybody involved and I think that is where the Amish are coming from. Forgivenss also helps the one doing the forgiving to avoid becoming bitter or fearful, fixating on pain, or getting stuck in a particular moment.
Ken said “unless you recognize that you have actually done wrong, forgiveness feels insulting, not loving.”
I’m still pondering whether forgiveness is whole and effective if the offending party has not repented or asked for forgiveness? It may help the forgiver but I’m not sure if being forgiven without being sorry actually does anything for the offender.
October 25, 2007 at 18:08
The Bible says a few things about anger.
Ephesians 4:25-27
Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.
Anger is a very powerful emotion. It is an extreme if you would say. And dwelling in extremes can give Satan a foothold. By remaining angry you open yourself up to bitterness and other emotions which are sinful.
Although anger in of itself isn’t sinful, I think there are different types of anger. Jesus said,
Matthew 5:22
But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, ‘Raca, ’ is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.
If the Bible says “In your anger do not sin.” yet Jesus here says anyone who is angry at his brother is subject to judgment.
I don’t know much if anything about Biblical languages but I would imagine that the two words used for anger in English have either fundamentally different meanings in the original text or the context brings different meaning.
Jesus expressed a holy anger when He drove the tax collectors out of the temple. We all know Jesus was never guilty of any sin so His anger obviously wasn’t the one deserving of judgment.
His anger was completely and totally justified and as Lord of that Temple and this world so were His actions.
Being angry is a necessary emotion and reaction. As with many emotions God has given us it is used to accomplish something. I think we need to ask ourselves however what our anger is accomplishing case by case.
What would have it accomplished for the Amish to remain angry with this disturbed individual who ended up killing himself? From what I read this man really just had an emotional breakdown. He wasn’t in his right frame of mind. He for all intents and purposes had a mental malfunction. He was now dead. His family now in this horrible situation…they didn’t cause him to do this. They were innocent. What would it have accomplished to remain angry with them? They were just as much victims as the children in that school room.